Just a quick note...okay, not really, more of a long rant.

So I've been re-reading back over my first post for this thing, and just wanted to clear some stuff up - the worst part of everything is the first month or so. When your daily adjustments are being done and you're still trying to get dressed with this thing on your leg and oh, could you carry only everything for me because my hands are supposed to be holding my crutches?

That stuff doesn't last all too long. After the first couple of months, you settle into your frame more and life kind of returns (somewhat) to normal. In the end, it became about as annoying as having a sprained ankle. The last three or so months I was even able to walk (read: shuffle) around the house/backyard without any crutches at all and before my cast, I was back driving again. With the frame on my right lower leg. In a manual (stick shift, for the Americans playing along at home) car. And it was fine. Oh, well...I'm kind of a bit sort of fairly sure you're also supposed to get the all-clear from your insurance company once you prove that you can pull off an emergency stop, but...y'know. Yeah, you should probably get that out of the way before you get back in the drivers seat...

With my cast on now, I'm not driving anymore because my foot is pretty much covered and I don't have any range of motion in my ankle, obviously. Means it's also a bit hard to walk as much as I'd been able to with my frame. But that besides...yeah, life went on. I got rid of the bikini bottoms as quickly as I could and returned to normal underwear, just had to navigate bits and pieces of clothing over and around the frame. 

I will mention a couple of things that drove me absolutely crazy over the whole thing, and they have nothing to do with being in a frame myself...I've been dying to say this for MONTHS and I'll probably get flamed for it, but I don't care. This is my blog. Don't like it, don't read it.

1. I get that not everybody has the greatest strength of character, or best willpower but never, and I mean NEVER underestimate the power of a positive attitude. Even if it's forced. Just keep telling yourself that everything is going to be okay, and you'll pull through. I've come across so much negativity from people in different "support" groups, I ended up doing away with them altogether. In fact, one of the group descriptions was something along the lines of "to recognise the pain it brings us daily". Admittedly, I should have known from that not to join, but alas, I learnt my lesson. Ever heard that saying, "Misery loves company"...?

Yes, you will have some mother b*tches of days. You've got a broken bone that you're manipulating, you're doing some very naughty things to your skeleton - it's going to hurt. You're allowed to have a bit of a whinge every now and again. But as soon as you've gotten it out of your system - chin up! I did much better, was much happier on my own than talking to the majority of people in groups who liked to focus directly on their frames and HOW it was stopping them from everyday living. Distract yourself if need be. TV shows, reading, scrapbooking, take up the guitar, whatever you need to do - do it. It's there. No amount of complaining is going to change that. At least you actually have a leg that it can be done to. At least you're not one of the unfortunate souls spending their days lying in an oncology ward. Even they try to stay positive. Talia Castellano, anyone? In the words of this 13 year old girl, "When people ask me [how I stay positive], what do you want me to do, be depressed?"

I have only met one other person that was as positive as I was, and they also left the group extremely quickly. They never even had my choice of being in a frame - they were involved in a particularly nasty motorbike accident and had their frame on much longer than I have (and obviously under much, er, grosser circumstances). And I can tell you for sure that we kept in touch and I actually enjoy talking to them, though we talk more about cross-country treks and gym than we do about our frames, haha.

Life goes on and it's up to you whether or not you're going to have fun during it, or sit around being miserable and wallowing in self-pity.

This kind of leads into my second point...

2. More than once (sooooo much more), I would come across people in frames who would claim that this whole thing "proves who your friends really are!" because they would stay home and they wouldn't get the amount of visitors they expected. Or maybe they really did just have bad friends? The point is - just because some things in your world may have forcibly come to a stop, don't expect that anybody else's will. And if you're being consistently negative, then frame or no, nobody is going to want to spend time with you.

Once you're alright to start leaving the house and getting about, then do it. Don't wait for people to come to you. Just because someone hasn't visited you since you had your surgery does not mean they consider you any less of a friend. This should just be common sense, but it hasn't proven to be all too common. Life gets busy. Maybe not for you, but it certainly does for other people.

Oh, man. That feels better. I could have expanded greatly upon that rant, but I got the main points I wanted to cover out of the way.

If I have offended anyone, I am genuinely sorry, but I really can't stand negative people and I won't have them in my life.

On a lighter note - 26 hours until I get my moon boot! HELLS YEAH!

One, two - WHOOP, WHOOP!

I'm free! The frame is off!

I won't go through the pre-op stuff, because it was pretty similar to the first time around. Again, don't remember being rendered unconscious. One moment I was telling somebody that I felt like I had been smoking something, the next, I was a bit more than half-asleep and throwing up into a hospital vomit bag. If I ever have to have morphine again, it'll be too soon.

Leg felt a lot lighter already, and I remember crying the instant I realised that the surgery was over. Kept repeating, "It's off, it's finally off..." to the nurses looking after me.

Cast! Hospital band still on, but about two minutes after getting home.

Was just a day admission, my surgery started about 11am, done before midday and I was checked out around 4pm the same day. Albeit still feeling slightly nauseated, drowsy and light headed from my body telling me it was hungry but having no appetite whatsoever. Got home and crashed hard, woke up around 10pm that night feeling almost back to normal.

So my cast is on for two weeks, it was either that or six weeks - it depended if we wanted to pay $150-something for an off-the-shelf moon boot or $750-something for a custom made moon boot that would be much more rigid. They aren't really covered by health care though. All this stuff was starting to drive me crazy though, and I had heard plenty of experiences of what having a cast was like so we went with the more expensive custom-made option. Two weeks is still too long, I actually liked having the frame on more than I like this damned plaster thing. Itchy and claustrophobic. Only two more days until it's off though. Still proud of the fact I've yet to get an infection. Let's keep fingers and toes crossed I make it out of everything as one of the few 100% infection-free TSF/Ilizarov patients! ^_^

But hey! I can cross my legs again.

Picture Error.

Oh, and I know about some previous photos not showing up - I think it happened when I reset my phone and consequently, my Google account. I'll get around to fixing those up soon, promise.

Kimimaro.

Such a cool name.

Healing.

So updates...

A rough date for frame removal has been set for September the 3rd. A bit later than originally expected, I'd hoped to have this thing off by now. But oh well.

Have begun using an Exogen Bone Healing System, it's an ultrasound device that basically stimulates your cells into developing bone faster. Can find more about it here: http://www.exogen.com/patients. Apparently it's not covered by private health and would normally cost about $1200 - $1600ish to purchase, but I was lucky enough that a representative had left an extra machine the day of my appointment for my surgeon to give to "somebody deserving", so I scored mine for free. Whoop!

Slightly inflamed.

The area around where my tibia has been broken has seemingly became inflamed overnight. I'm honestly not too worried about it, since inflammation and bone growth go hand-in-hand. But the stabbing pains are a tad irritating. I've started going for walks around the block every second day as being bed ridden has lost it's novelty somewhat, but I may have to stop until the pain settles down again.

Can see the area raised here.

Not much else going on with it, other than sitting around and waiting for my next appointment. Hopefully will get the green light to go ahead with the Sept 3rd surgery, but we shall see. Once the frame has been taken off, I get a lower leg plaster cast on for about a week while my moon boot gets made up. Not looking forward to the cast. At all. But once the moon boot is ready, I get it off and go into that instead. Physio is supposed to start two and a half weeks after the frame removal so I can learn how to walk normally again and unlearn any bad habits the crutches may have given me. Should be fun. [/sarcasm]

Can still totally rock heels, though.

Live long and prosper.

Peace and long life.

Extreme delay, much?

Haven't updated my blog in a little while, because there honestly hasn't been a whole lot to report.
I've had my four wires removed though, they were removed about a month ago now. Since the parentals were overseas and I didn't want them to come back to more hospital fees, I decided to stop being a wimp and get the wires removed in my surgeon's office for free. Took two Endone and two Panadol about an hour beforehand and that was it. And when it was over, I realised how silly it would have been if I'd elected to go
back under for it, it was all done so quickly.

Lying in my specialist's office, the band aids were removed from around the pin sites, my leg was cleaned with some sort of sanitising solution, possibly saline but I'm not too sure and then my wires were loosened slightly from my frame. It was all a very weird sensation, able to be felt actually within my leg, within my bone, almost verging on painful and yet not quite...not too sure exactly how to explain it, other than plain out weird.

Bit of bleeding afterwards...

Then the wires were both cut on the inside of my leg. My leg kind of felt a bit freer, but this is when it started getting a little uncomfortable - the wires felt as if they jolted my bone as they were cut. I was told to take a couple of deep breaths and then before I really knew what was going on, my surgeon pulled, hard, on the wires, one right after the other and they came out clean through the other side of my leg. The wire removal itself took maybe three seconds. Five at the absolute most. I yelled at this point, but it was more like a brief yelp than resembling an actual scream, heh.

About a month after the wire removal.

Mother of everything mighty, it hurt.

But only for about five seconds. Albeit those five seconds were pretty horrible...and then I think my body may have started going into shock or I was having some sort of adrenaline kicking in from the sudden pain - I'd suddenly become nauseated, dizzy and light headed, vision was blurry, had difficulty breathing and felt overall very weak. But had some water and my specialist talked me through taking some deep breaths and made me sit still for a little while. About five minutes later, I'd calmed down enough to get off the table and hobble around again, although the actual pain really only lasted a couple of seconds.

Six weeks of bone growth.

 The entire appointment from walking through his door to walking out again took maybe 10 - 15 minutes, definitely not worth having to pay anesthetist fees and clearing half a day to go into surgery for it. Waterproof bandages were put over the holes left in my leg that I was to leave in place for three days before we could take them off and then leave them uncovered.

As I said, that was about a month ago and the pin sites are almost completely healed now, I think. My ankle immediately felt much freer to move around after the removal and I have to say that I still don't regret a single thing I've done so far.

Except for not take a 'before' picture, forgetting to have done that still bugs me...

So apart from that, there hasn't been all too much change. There have been good and bad days, but mostly good days. I'm near bedridden for the bad days and the pain is enough that just rolling over in bed is agony, but I'm saying this more as a statement of fact of this is what happens rather than an actual complaint.

Had a check up a few days ago, have about six weeks of bone growth and my specialist seems happy with my progress, so I'm happy as well. ^_^

Aaaaaaand we're done!

We've stopped stretching! Whooo!

There have been two check-ups since the last entry, but nothing much to report. Everything has been going pretty much to plan with not a heap of change other than the space between bone fragments.

My fourth process x-ray, approx. 3.5 stretch.

Since we've stopped stretching, the pain has definitely settled down, which is great! I get a bit of pain at the outer top wire - the most annoying of the wires because like I've explained before, it's lodged in the muscle group that is most involved with general leg movement. Cleaning is still painful, but a lot less than it had been previously. Before I would take two Panadols before my shower and then an Endone after cleaning, but now I only take the Panadol.

The four smaller wires are able to be removed now, there are two options: to have them cut and pulled out in Dr Astori's office with just a couple of Endone and Panadol or to go back into surgery and be completely under while they are removed.

After having agreed with my Mum over what a baby I am when it comes to pain, we both prefer if I was put under anesthetic for the process lest we scare Dr Astori's other patients off with my cries of pain (the walls in his office are pretty thin). My parents are going overseas soon for about four weeks, and they want me to wait until they back due to lack of fundage. The plus of getting them removed in his office is that it wouldn't cost any extra, but...yeah. Pain. I'm being a baby, I know. My next appointment isn't for another month, so I have that time to change my mind/talk myself into having momentary courage. We'll see.

So right now the only thing I'm having to do is to stretch my calf muscle out. Because while the bone

Post-stretch! 4cm length attained!

fragments have been stretched into the correct position - my calf muscle hasn't quite caught up yet. This means my foot drops down a bit and I have limited range of motion in my foot.

My goal for my next appointment is to be beginning to put more weight on my leg and only rely on one of my crutches rather than the both of them. I'm not too sure what else to write, there really hasn't been a whole heap going on, but if anyone has any questions, feel free to ask. :)

Oh, and happy Easter! Enjoy your guilt-free chocolate eating today. ^_^

I am not fond of Telstra.

Had my last check-up with Dr Astori on Wednesday the 13th, wasn't able to update since then because our WiFi connection at home has been pretty sketchy the last few days. More so than it usually is, I mean. Telstra, do not like.

Everything is still on track, Dr Astori still seems quite happy with how everything is proceeding and says that everything looks as it should.

I've started the Keflex/Ielex anyway, as a couple of the pin sites on the outer side of my leg have been seriously bugging me. They were quite a nice shade of purple for a little while, which worried us slightly, but apparently they're not infected until they turn red. A really bright, fire engine red. Basically if it does get infected, we won't have any doubts about if it looks infected or not, we'll know for sure. I'm just going to finish this round anyway, but we have another script if I actually need to take them for a serious infection.

Progress x-ray number 3. Eep.

It's been suggested that instead of doing all the turns at night, when my boyfriend gets home from work/before bed, that we attempt to do as many as we can during the day or before he leaves so that my body adjusts to it before we go to bed and hopefully, that should ease the night pains. The night pains haven't been so bad recently, maybe because of that, but just in case, I take a couple of Panadol before going to bed and if I wake up again, then I take the Endone. I'm allowed to take 10mg (two tablets), but I've been trying to limit myself to just one at a time because I don't want to become too reliant on pain meds. It's still pretty sore in the morning when I wake up, though. My morning ritual is to immediately have a couple of Panadol with coffee before even tucking into breakfast. I've been trying to eat a bit healthier too, I went off the fruits, vitamins and green tea for a bit and that's when my pin sites seemed to bug me a bit more. I have no idea if that had anything to do with eating like crap (eat all the junk food!), but y'know - better to be safe than sorry, I guess. Too bad lychee's are out of season now, though...banana, strawberry and lychee smoothies are amazing..

Anyway, there's still about a week and a half until we stop stretching, I think, and I've been told that once we do - everything that's annoying me about my leg should ease up. I'm also having the four smaller wires removed once the stretching has stopped, which I'm really excited/nervous for! I'm excited to finally start being able to take the device apart, even if the majority of it is staying on another five months, but I'm nervous because it can be done whilst in his office by having the ends cut and then pulling the wires out through the skin. I seriously hope I'm getting some pain killers for that. I'm pretty anxious as to how it's going to feel during the removal...but I cannot wait to get these things out of me! Haha. The five big pins/screws in my tibia are fine, my tibia isn't exactly having too much movement when I'm trying to get around, but it's the smaller pins/wires that I've been told everybody complains about. Especially the two on my outer side as they're going through muscles that do deal with quite a bit of movement when the leg is being moved, flexed, etc. They're also the most painful areas to clean, so I'm looking forward to eventually only having five pin sites (and the easier ones, at that) rather than having the entire nine to get through.

My foot is still swelling up, obviously, which has been a pain in the butt when it comes to sitting down to study or standing for too long. I still have my leg compressor socks from the hospital, it was put over my leg that wasn't to be operated on (the left), but we've found that if I put as much of it as I can over my right foot - the swelling gets better! My foot is feeling like a foot now, and not more like a glove filled with water.

We'll see how tonight goes though, because tonight is that concert I mentioned earlier that I'll be working. I'm sure I'll manage to get through the night, but it's the next couple of days (nights...) that I'm worried about. Damn you, stubbornness! Ah well. We shall see...